Truth

Ok I know, if I am breaking back into the blog-o-sphere this is probably not the post you all would be expecting. And if you want the truth, I've been doing some thinking about this blog of mine. The last time I posted it was in June. So, the natural thought to this could be one of several things

1) It's been summer and she is too busy living to post about living
2) It's been summer and she taking some time off
3) She leads a boring life and has nothing to write about
4) She's now into Instagramming and has no time for the clunkiness of posting on an actual computer
5) There are so many important things to write about she doesn't know where to begin.
6) She'll never be caught up - so she's probably not even trying
7) The guilt of not writing is paralyzing her.

Which one did you think?
The answer. All of the above.

So, having pondered all of these things for a while and I finally became prompted and inspired by these people (really, nothing new). Stacy Julian, Rhonna Ferrar and Becky Higgins.

(Watch them on their "Studio 5" segment that aired last week. It's only 5 minutes (then if you're feeling adventurous, they each also have their own 5 minute segment).

Back in the day, Stacy Julian was the one who gave me permission not to have to feel like I had to scrapbook every picture or scrapbook in chronological order. She, and Rhonna and Becky, are now giving me permission to do what works for me when it comes to memory keeping.

That being said, I love my blog and I love reading back and looking at the pictures so I'll still be here. I'll still be posting about so-and-so's birthday or this-and-that activity (when I feel like it) but, what gets me in a funk is feeling the pressure to "stay caught up"and trying to document all the important stuff going on AND to make it so meaningful that it will move others to tears. So many other people are good at it, sadly I am not. To me it's overwhelming and paralyzing. So, I'm giving myself the freedom to post random and unimportant things whenever I feel like it - even if we've just been in the midst of the most important events of our lives. In fact, here's a clue to the inner workings of Stefani (a scary place to be)... the more random the post, the more likely I have a lot of really meaningful things going on in my life. There that's it. That's the truth. Embarrassing and probably a little self-centered. But I do feel like part of my story telling has to do with just that - the inner-working of Stefani. I believe you can tell a lot about a person by their insane ramblings. Maybe that's it - I want my posterity to know me (insanity and all).

So in honor of my new found freedom here's the latest weird, but true, thought out of my head.

It has to do with 

Target. Tarjay. The Red Circle Boutique. or just, The Boutique

One of my favorite hangouts.

I often go in there to get one or 2 small things. Something like air freshener and mascara. No cart needed right? The reality of it is, I usually find myself walking to the cash register with my arms full, things flung over my shoulders and dropping things on the floor in almost every department, because I should have gotten a cart - or at the very least a shopping basket.

There have been times where I walk into the store and tell myself to get a cart - and then I talk myself out of it saying, "No, it'll save me money if I have to hold the items." I'm sure you can imagine what happens.  I usually find myself walking to the cash register with my arms full, things flung over my shoulders and dropping things on the floor in almost every department because I should have gotten a cart - or at the very least a shopping basket.

Until recently I thought I was a freak - a shopaholic, unbridled in my desires. Then I saw this and now I know, it's all completely out of my control.

At least she had the good sense to get a cart.